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How Do Women Play Themselves in Dating

July 24, 2026

How Do Women Play Themselves in Dating

Do you want to know how women often play themselves in dating? Well, here’s what I know: if you’re a high-achieving woman, then you are gonna try to make things happen! You’re gonna be dating a lot, and you’re thinking, “I’m dating a lot. I’m winning. I’m doing it.”

No, dating a lot is actually the wrong way of thinking about this.

I like to think about dating in a Quality over Quantity type of way, but so many of you are dating a lot of guys when most of the guys out there are not gonna be the one. Yeah, they’re not gonna be actually ready for a relationship. So, you’re doing all this work in a really shitty pond.

So yeah, I can understand why you’re frustrated and disappointed, which puts you in a starting and stopping pattern of dating. It kills your momentum (and results) in dating. I teach my clients how to date with strategy so that they’re dealing with 9s and 10s and not the 5s and 6s.

So many of you are dealing with the 5s and 6s, and the danger part about dealing with the 5s and 6s is that because you’re engaging with them for a long time, whether it’s an ex, whether it’s someone that you’ve known for a long time; you will actually believe that all you deserve is a 5 or a 6, and it becomes your love upper limit.

That’s the danger of staying in those relationships, which is one of the reasons why I would prefer that you hold out until a 9 or a 10, versus settling and engaging with the 5s and the 6s. Most of you are engaging with the 5s and the 6s, and that’s why dating is such a painful experience and why you are often playing yourself in dating.

We get to do it a different way, and if you want to learn how to do it that way, book a consultation call with me, and we will definitely work it out, alright? Hope that helps.

Whenever You Are Ready

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- Check out the Get Your Guy Coaching Podcast- With more than 100 episodes, you can binge and learn so much with my podcast. Check out the latest episode here.